


hold on, i still need you

by sinceresapphire



Series: Oh Look, I've Been Prompted [37]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Long Live Feedback Comment Project, Platonic Affection, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 21:59:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15715902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinceresapphire/pseuds/sinceresapphire
Summary: Ray and Sara share a moment post-death totem takeover.





	hold on, i still need you

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Legends friendship fic: Sara and Ray, "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere." [This is from the first column of quotes.] --So, obviously I'm interested in some hurt/comfort (could easily be emotional h/c). 
> 
> Title taken from the song "Hold On" by Chord Overstreet - yes this a platonic fic but I've been listening to this song a lot and it helped set the mood for the fic.

Among the many things she’s experienced over her life especially in the last few years, Sara admits wielding the death totem is definitely up there in the top five worst things ever. She attacked her crew and did serious harm to them.

 

How they can still stand to be around her, is astonishing.

 

It’s late on the Waverider and with the rest of the team fast asleep in their bunks, Sara lets her body relax as she swirls around the alcohol in her glass.

 

Sara freezes when she hears footsteps approaching her.

 

Who on Earth could be up at this time of night besides her?

 

To be fair, they all have their nights when sleep alludes them because of things they’ve seen and done but she’s positive that today’s mission should have worn them all out enough to fall deep asleep.

 

It doesn’t take long for her to get her answer.

 

Ray freaking Palmer.

 

Sara takes a step backwards without thinking about it because the last time they were alone, she nearly killed him and has definitely not forgotten it.

 

“Sara? What are you doing up?” he asks as he enters the room.

 

“Oh, you know…thinking of another plan for dealing with Mallus and what’s going on with Ava,” she shrugs, trying to play aloof as she leans against her desk.

 

Ray stares at her while considering her words.

 

Over the years, she’s learned the art of lying especially to good people and that involves incorporating a grain of truth or a thread of realism. Also…a person needs to be specific when they lie or else, they’ll get caught for sure.

 

“Need a sounding board to bounce ideas off?” Ray asks as he sits down on a chair.

 

Frowning, she didn’t want him to stay.

 

Who knows what could happen, what she could do to him.

 

“I’ve got it, thanks!” she snapped at him.

 

Ray’s eyes widen in shock at her reaction to his question then he looks down at the ground.

 

Internally, Sara flinches at his reaction.

 

“You should go get some sleep, Ray,” she says calmly.

 

“I’m not the only one that should,” he replies looking up at her.

 

Silence falls over them for a few minutes as neither knows what to say.

 

Looking down into the amber liquid, Sara loses herself in her thoughts so the sight of a hand on her forearm catches her off guard and her head snaps upwards, meeting Ray’s gaze.

 

There’s something in his stare she can’t identify.

 

“What’s going on, Sara? You haven’t been yourself lately and I’m worried about you,” he comments.

 

Ray Palmer – always the boy scout who cares too damn much about people he really shouldn’t; what is his deal?

 

“Nothing’s wrong, you’re seeing things,” she states feebly.

 

Somehow, nearly killing Ray, out of everyone, feels the worst to her and maybe it has something to do with knowing him the longest and both their shared history and friends. So, her actions towards him under the influence of the death totem feels the most personal.

 

Or maybe, he’s always the most forgiving…the most optimistic out of everyone.

 

Her eyes dart around the room, barely able to stand looking at Ray.

 

It’s really like looking directly at the sun and hurts just as much.

 

It’s hard being around him these days and she suffocates from the guilt of what happened and his easy forgiveness and understanding, two things she doesn’t feel like she deserves.

 

“God, Ray…how can you be so _nice_ , so _you_ ….after what I did. You should, by all rights, be six feet under right now,” Sara exclaims as she runs a hand through her hair.

 

Using the placement of his hand on her forearm, he gently pulls her towards him until he’s able to wrap his arms around her in a hug.

 

The hug is her undoing.

 

Her hands hold tight to his shirt as she holds her body tense in his embrace until the flood gates open and her body immediately relaxes. Then her shoulders shake as she cries, releasing everything that’s she’s been feeling.

 

Vaguely, Sara feels him pick her up then move across the room to the chair before sitting down with her in his lap.

 

It’s a strange position to be in and she fights her gut reaction to flee.

 

Of course, she’s sure he wouldn’t let her go so easily unless she put up a fight and that’s something she doesn’t have in her.

 

Ray gently rubs her back and that makes her cry harder.

 

It’s times like this that make her miss Laurel more than anything else in the world; her sister helped her in ways she never thanked her for.

 

She could only imagine what Laurel would say about Ava.

 

Pulling away, Sara doesn’t look at his face.

 

"I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere,” says Ray firmly as he gently strokes her cheek.

 

It’s rare that anyone on the team gets to see her like this.

 

But Sara knows she can trust Ray, that he won’t say anything to anyone else because this, this moment is between the two of them and no one else. Though, she ought to say something to Gideon too, just in case.

 

The engines hum softly in the background.

 

They sit in silence, both knowing there’s nothing that needs to be said.

 

After a few minutes, Sara stands then stretches her arms over her head before holding out a hand to help Ray stand.

 

“Come on, its time to get some sleep. I can’t have my genius falling asleep while working on his super-suit, now can I?” questions Sara with a smirk.

 

Ray laughs, not loud enough to wake anyone up but enough to make her smile.

 

“Ma’am, yes ma’am,” he replies.

 

Taking her hand, Ray stands up then copies her stretching.

 

Sara can’t help thinking that everyone deserves to have their own Ray Palmer; her life is certainly better for having him in it.

 

As they head off to their respective quarters, she smiles to herself.

 

Yeah, Ray Palmer is a good guy to have around.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the LLF Comment Project, which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
> Short comments  
> Long comments  
> Questions  
> Constructive criticism  
> “<3” as extra kudos  
> Reader-reader interaction  
> This author replies to comments.
> 
> “If you don’t want a reply, for any reason (sometimes I feel shy when I’m reading and not up to starting a conversation, for example), feel free to sign your comment with “whisper” and I will appreciate it but not respond!“


End file.
